Game of Wit and Luck
by X4uth0r
Summary: You've heard of K-Unit taking care of a young Alex... but what about Alex taking care of a young K-unit? Meet Alex Rider, official babysitter for the grumpy Damon, sneaky Ben, calm Evan, and energetic Rodney. Alex has his work cut out for him- especially if he's going to babysit all four boys at once... It was going to be a long night... AUish. Pre-Stormbreaker.
1. Introduction(s)

**Just a prologue- real action starts next chapter. Oh, and by the way, this is _nothing_ like Life of a Spy. You've been warned.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Alex Rider.**

O-o-O-o-O

"Come here, Alex."

Alex immediately reacted at the order, putting down the book he had been reading, moving off of the sofa to go to the door, where his uncle was waiting.

"What is it?" The teenager watched as Ian's eyes seemed to sweep over him, assessing and evaluating him. He didn't particularly _like_ it, but Alex had noticed it had been happening his entire life; his uncle always pushed him to his full potential, finding his weaknesses and exploiting them.

_"Weaknesses will only be used against you, Alex. I am merely exerting them until they are strengths, instead. Do you understand?"_

That was what Ian had said after he had been beaten up by three older boys- it didn't matter if they had been at least four years older than him, and that he been doing karate for less than two years, or even that he had been trying to _protect_ someone else... because Ian had seen the previous victim he had been helping, as a weakness, and he _had_ been; he had also said that it was fine to help people- as long as he always won in the end, aka, he didn't get caught doing it.

It hadn't been much of a surprise to Ian, when the three boys had later been attacked by an unknown assailant, and that they had never bullied another kid since.

Instead of receiving praise for the elaborate trap that had been made, Ian critiqued him on using floor instead of sand as a blinding tool. Alex hadn't been disheartened, or even surprised- it _was_ Ian, after all.

The teen was jerked out of his memories by Ian, who was talking again.

"You are old enough that I don't need to explain any last-minute instructions- but Jack _is_ on vacation, which means you will have to take care of a babysitting job later today."

Alex was unfazed- it certainly wasn't the first time Ian had sprung something on him, or deliberately put him into a stressful situation in order to test him.

"Ages? How many? And how long?" Alex asked calmly, not missing how his uncle seemed to be studying his reaction.

Ian's lips twitched, eyes glinting with approval. "Four boys, approximately between the ages of seven and eight. They will arrive by 1500- their parents will be picking them up late tonight."

The boy nodded, inwardly wincing at his predicament. Four kids- the kind that were energetic? _He_ certainly hadn't been very hyperactive as a child, and had been surprised to see his peers act so... _immature_ and _childish._ "Is that all?"

"Yes, it is." Ian glanced at his watch, and then to the packed suitcase beside him. "I'll be back in a week."

Alex was unconvinced- it wasn't the first time his uncle had told him that, only to return nearly a month later. "Just try not to come back with another broken arm," his voice was dripping in sarcasm.

"Goodbye, Alex."

"See you later, Ian."

With that, he was gone.

After triple-locking the door (not to mention the deadbolt), Alex flopped back on the couch, reaching for his book. He had over an hour to kill before they came.

O-o-O-o-O

The doorbell rang.

Critically, Alex glanced toward the front door, then to his watch. They shouldn't have come for another hour, unless... he sighed. Of course, he should have seen the loophole.

_"They will arrive by 1500."_

Ian had specified that they would come _by_ 3:00, not _at_ 3:00.

It was only 2:00, and his uncle had still managed to be truthful.

Ian liked to give misinformation- it was just another way of testing him.

Still, Alex was careful to look through the peephole to confirm a middle-aged couple with a scowling eight-year-old boy.

But it was only _one_\- not four. Why would Ian have lied like that? Usually, he would have intentionally _underestimated_, not _overestimated._ Overestimation was _easier_ for him- and he knew how much his uncle like to make things as difficult as possible.

The woman smiled. "I'm Norma Romero- you must be Alex. Ian told us all about you- thank you _so_ much for taking care of Damon, I know he can be quite a handful."

"My name _isn't_ Damon," the boy insisted. "It's _Wolf_, remember?"

Mrs. Romero looked apologetic. "Sorry- he won't stop going on about it- ever since he and his friends played soldiers." She laughed. "Apparently, they were 'K-Unit," and they were at some boot camp! Amazing what children can come up with these days...""

Alex chuckled, trying to play along. Would there be _more_ kids coming? "It's fine- I don't mind calling him Wolf." He didn't mention that Ian would never have accepted that amount of immaturity from him when he was younger.

Mrs. Romero still seemed flustered. "I'm sorry- we really have to rush, he can eat at six, bedtime is at eight. Thanks again!"

As soon as the door closed, Damon began to inspect the house- rather critically.

"Why do you have so many locks?" Damon, or rather, Wolf, asked- was it curiosity? Or did he think it was weird?

"My uncle insists on it," Alex explained.

"Why?"

The teenager grit his teeth. "To keep me safe."

Wolf frowned. "Why? Aren't you old enough to take care of yourself?"

Alex rolled his eyes. "Ok, fine. It's saf_er_." What was with all these questions? Ian had drilled hit into him that _yes,_ there _was_ such thing as stupid questions, or worse, _pointless_ questions.

The boy squinted, as if debating on whether or not he was going to accept the answer, but shrugged. "Whatever. What're we going to do first?"

"How about you read a book?" Alex suggested. "Or do you have any homework?"

Wolf raised his eyebrows (the teenager noticed he hadn't quite managed one eyebrow, yet). "You're kidding, right? Books are for sissies. Besides, it's summer, remember?"

The teen could have face-palmed himself- and Ian _certainly_ would have punished him for making such a stupid mistake. Normal kids didn't have uncles that gave them homework during the summer (which was usually _harder_ than the stuff his teachers gave him). And- normal eight-year-olds wouldn't even _enjoy_ reading (if at all), until they fully comprehended it and could actually appreciate... not to mention Ian had him reading Shakespeare in French when _he_ had been eight. "Right- sorry. So what _do_ you want to do?"

Wolf glanced at the TV in the corner. "Got any video games?"

Alex shook his head. "Ian doesn't like them- says it turns your brain to mush." And when nine-year-old Alex had protested, saying it increased hand-eye coordination, Ian had merely laughed, telling him to go play table tennis, or find something that didn't involve addiction or wasting time. His uncle hadn't been a big fan of computers, either; thus, he had limited time and access to wi-fi, as well.

Wolf snorted. "Seriously? That's lame."

The teen didn't have a chance to reply, as the doorbell rang once more.

Another couple, this time with two boys. "Hello, we're the Daniels," the mom greeted. "Thanks for taking this job, Alex- I know four boys will be difficult."

So there _were_ going to be four of them- but were they from separate families?

Mr. Daniels introduced the boys. "This is my own son, Ben, and this is Evan- his parents asked us to drop him off."

"No!" Wolf violently protested. "It's _Fox_ and _Snake_, remember?"

"Get it right, dad," Ben, or Fox, muttered.

Evan _(Snake_, Alex reminded himself) merely rolled his eyes.

The Daniels waved goodbye as they hurried toward their car. "See you later- their bedtimes are the same as Roman's!"

After closing and locking the door behind him, Alex turned to face the three boys, who were chatting excitedly to one another, ignoring him entirely.

As Ian would have done, Alex observed them carefully, filing away any information he could.

Wolf was Hispanic; he was grumpy, but seemed to be the leader, most likely the oldest, as well.

Snake looked the youngest- as of now- maybe around seven. He was also the quietest one- and the only one with a Scottish accent.

Fox was the most intelligent of the group-,in his own little way- younger than Wolf, older than Snake. He wasn't the leader (_or wouldn't be **able** to lead,_ Alex guessed), but he _was_ the strategist. Speaking with a Liverpool accent, he wasn't exactly _quiet_, but _did_ seem to be the most observant- he was _also_ probably the most similar to Alex himself.

Fox glanced around. "Eagle isn't here, is he?"

Wolf shook his head seriously (but from an eight-year-old, it was almost impossible to be taken seriously). "No, but we need to prepare."

Alex frowned. "For what?"

The three boys froze as the doorbell ran once more.

Wolf went into action. "Come on guys, let's go."

Alex was about to intervene, when the boys ran into the kitchen. The teen sighed, moving to open the door.

This couple was, by far, the most stressed.

"I'm Eric Willis," the man forced a smile. "This is Rodney."

The seven-year-old looked like he was on a sugar high, or probably ADD or ADHD- he was bouncing up and down, grinning wildly.

"Sorry, he just snuck a cup of coffee," Mrs. Willis apologized.

Alex nearly chocked. Ian had only recently let him drink coffee- even then, in small amounts, and not very frequent. But a seven-year-old _kid?!_

The couple departed quickly, leaving him with the hyperactive boy.

Rodney was definitely the youngest- and he would certainly be a handful. He would be the one that would always crack a joke in the midst of a tense atmosphere, but immensely loyal.

"Eagle, right?" Alex asked for confirmation.

"_Finally_, at least _somebody_ gets it right," Eagle latched his eyes on him briefly before becoming distracted by the rest of the living room, having the urge to be incredibly _close_ to the objects, and touch them.

Alex grit his teeth when Eagle was about to pick up the Japanese mask Ian had gotten several years back. He knew a warning would not suffice. "Come on, kid- your friends are in the kitchen.

His eyes lit up- from the food, or his friends, he didn't know.

They walked in the kitchen, and the teenager nearly gasped in surprise. How had three boys _done_ this much damage in less than three minutes?!

Alex found the fridge door open, the pantry invaded, and three unimpressed boys, and half the food on the floor- from both the refrigerator and the food pantry.

Wolf was staring incredulously at the wide variety of healthy foods. "This is _so_ lame- where's the chips and soda? Where's the junk food?"

Fox could only agree. "Yeah, it's worse than _Snake's_ mom." He shuddered. "Health-kicks."

They ignored Snake's indignant "hey!", and continued to rummage through the food.

Alex rolled his eyes. He would clean this mess up later. "Look on the bright side- you don't have to hide anything from Eagle."

Wolf shrugged, Fox smirked, and Snake sighed.

Eagle wasn't paying attention, focused on the task of finding food that would sustain his sugar high.

After putting away the few items that would be perishable if they stayed out, Alex herded the kids out of the kitchen, locking it behind him.

"First off- some quick rules: Ian's, Jack's, and my room are all off limits- so is the kitchen, until further notice. Try not to break anything." He looked at them in turn, to make sure they understood- they did, albeit grudgingly. "Anyway... who's up for a game of hide-and-go-seek?"

O-o-O-o-O

**Whatcha think? Any suggestions for my writing and/or ideas? Tell me your predictions on how you think hide-and-seek will go...**


	2. Hide-and-Seek

**Eh- yeah. Life of a Spy takes top priority. Updates for this one will be slow until my other main story finishes.**

**From now on, go to my profile for guest review replies; I'll PM the signed reviews (I thought it would be awkward to reply this late... so I didn't. But thanks!)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Alex Rider.**

O-o-O-o-O

_("Hide-and-seek?" Ian raised an eyebrow doubtfully._

_Seven-year-old Alex nodded vigorously/enthusiastically. "Please, Ian? I've played with some of the neighbors' kdis and it's really fun!"_

_Ian pursed his lips. It wasn't the worst game, and it did certainly have potential for teaching. "Alright, I suppose so."_

_Alex beamed. "Thanks, Ian! You're It first. I'll hide, and you try to find me!"_

_"I know the rules of hide-and-seek, Alex," Ian said dryly._

_The boy deflated a bit, but then realized Ian had already closed his eyes and begun counting._

_After a brief hesitation, he scurried/scampered away._

_Ian sighed- he would need to teach his nephew the art of moving silently. From the painfully/painstakingly /and footsteps, Alex was-_

_Ian winced._

_Jack's room- although she was out shopping, it still wasn't a wise choice._

_Oh well. At least it would only take a few more rounds before Alex was an expert._

_0-0-0-0-0_

_Alex frowned. "How do you keep finding me so easily?" His uncle hadn't been letting him be It until he learned to hide better. What had started as a fun game, had ended up a lecture._

_Ian sighed. "You're too loud. You need to learn how to walk silently," he continued, annoyed when Alex opened his mouth to ask an idiotic question. "And I'm not giving you extra time, nor am I going to go easy on you- you'll learn how do this _right_, OK?"_

_The boy nodded, a bit wearisome. Hide-and-seek was supposed to be _fun_. Why wasn't he enjoying it as much as last time? _

_Then he realized- Ian hadn't been playing last time. He had a tendency to make things a _lot less fun_, and more like a 'teaching moment.'_

_He'd always try _really_ hard, and he never won against Ian- with anything._

_I'll show him, Alex thought determinedly. I'm smaller than him. I should win this more than he does. And then- when _I'm_ It, I'll find him so fast- like _that!

_Even then, there was a small sliver of doubt in his mind._

_He ignored it._

_0-0-0-0-0_

_Cautiously, Alex opened his eyes. He hadn't heard Ian at _all_, but it wouldn't be hard to find him... right?_

_It had taken a few more frustrated turns, and he'd used up _all_ of the great hiding places he had already set up, and Ian had found him really quickly! Part of him wondered if Ian was cheating- it wouldn't be unlike him to do that; after all, Ian always said it wasn't cheating if you could get away with it. _

_But finally, he had relented- and let him be It!_

_As Alex scoped each room carefully for any signs of him and found-_

_Nothing._

_He had to double-check each room._

_And then he went through them a third time- the bathrooms, his room, Jack's, and quick peek in Ian's room. Then it had been on to the basement, kitchen, closets..._ everywhere, e_xcept..._

_Ian's office. _

_Alex swallowed, staring wide-eyed at the forbidding door. _

_He wasn't _allowed_ to go in there. Ian had made that clear. _

_And Ian got _really_ angry when Alex disobeyed him- he never yelled, but he wouldn't _play_ with him, or talk to him, or do anything! He would completely ignore him- no cooking, no meals, no help with anything. He would completely _isolate_ him- not even going outside! Ian would mostly lock himself in his office- it didn't matter if Alex pleaded, begged, or apologized, over and over again- nothing had any affect._

_But Alex didn't get lonely easily... but when Ian ignored him like that._

_He didn't like it._

_Alex yearned for that attention- or even, rarely- praise. But that didn't happen very often._

_The seven-year-old glanced over his shoulder, like Ian was ready to swoop in and scold him and-_

_It was just a door. He didn't even have to go inside- but he could try opening it, and just calling inside! Yeah, he would be doing anything _wrong_ if he just opened the door._

_Alex's hand reached for the doorknob, just about to-_

_"What are you doing?" Ian's harsh voice reprimanded._

_The boy whirled around, a guilty expression on his face, an excuse was_ almost _ready-_

_Ian took the scene quickly. "You know you're not allowed in there, Alex."_

_"I couldn't find you!" Alex blurted out. "I looked_ everywhere_, but you weren't there!"_

_"Quiet, Alex."_

_Alex quieted._

_"We're done." With one more disgusted look, Ian turned back to the door, taking out a key-_

_"But- Ian!"_

_His words were already falling on deaf ears._

_The door slammed shut.)_

O-o-O-o-O

"_I'm_ It!"

"No, it's _my_ turn. You got to be It last time, remember?"

Eagle scowled at the older boy. "That's not fair!"

Arms crossed, Wolf glared back. "I'm the leader, which means I'm It."

Snake seemed to stifle a sigh, whereas Fox didn't bother, rolling his eyes.

"Quiet, you two," Alex intervened, breaking up the minuscule fight before it got larger. "I'll be It."

Wolf squinted, but accepted it as fair- causing the others to agree with him. "Fine. But let's get the rules straight, first."

Snake frowned. "It's hide-and-seek. How complex can it get?"

By the guilty expression on Fox's face, Alex guessed he had already been trying to find ways to 'legally cheat.'

"The boundaries are the same," the teen continued. "Count aloud- not fast." He sent them warning sign. It wasn't like would matter to _him_, playing hide-and-seek had taught Alex many things- and this was _his_ home territory. He hardly had lost to other kids _before_ playing with Ian... but after that, it became ridiculously easy.

"One minute," Wolf suggested- which, the teenager had to assume was the amount he would have already been set on- no room for compliance.

Once the other boys had agreed, Alex closed his eyes. "I'm counting," he murmured, which caused a mad rush of scrambling- not _too_ difficult to distinguish between the boys, especially considering that he had already matched their walking patterns to their persons.

Alex's eyes flickered open.

It took a grand total of thirty seconds before he found Eagle- sure, hiding behind the couch had been pretty typical as hiding places went- but it wasn't very an original, as they went, and he was so... _loud_.

The boy frowned. "You cheated."

Alex rolled his eyes. "You're too loud- and that's an obvious hiding spot."

Eagle narrowed his eyes, but his expression smoothed out. "At least I can help you look for the others!"

"No," Alex said flatly. "That won't be necessary." His eyes flickered to the couch. "Stay here- and _please_ don't break anything."

Without waiting for an answer, the teen stalked out of the room. Fox had gone upstairs, along with Snake- and Wolf... he frowned, concentrating. Was he in the bathroom?

It was on the same floor- more efficient if he started with it.

Inside the bathroom, Wolf seemed to have been attempting to squeeze himself in the bathroom cabinets- hence the half-empty cabinet and the cleaning supplies that were scattered on the floor. He mentally sighed- more things to clean up afterward. Maybe hide-and-seek wasn't the best game after all.

And Wolf- where was he? Ah, he had heard him coming and was right behind-

"Found you." Alex pulled the shower curtain aside, and a scowling boy pushed himself through.

"Whatever. It wasn't fair, anyway- you didn't give me enough time."

The teen ignored the comment. "Go to the living room!" He called over his shoulder, already leaving the bathroom. "Keep Eagle out of trouble."

He heard both Fox and Snake go upstairs- and there were two rooms that weren't locked: the bathroom and spare guest room.

O-o-O-o-O

Once upstairs, Alex stopped, standing still.

The only logical choice would be one of the guest bedrooms, or perhaps, the other bathroom.

Still... his room was locked, as well as Ian's bedroom and office.

The teenager silently opened the door to the guest bedroom; he briefly scoped the room.

"Come on Snake," Alex muttered. "You can do better than that. Out from under the bed."

There was a small scuffle, and Snake emerged from under the bed. "I ran out of time," the boy huffed.

Alex was ignoring him, and checking the rest of the room.

He stiffened. "Snake- where's Fox?" He wouldn't have hidden in the bathroom- Alex would have heard the door opening. And, unsurprisingly, Fox had cheated, or, as he might have put it 'bent the rules.'

Snake narrowed his eyes. "I'm not telling you- that would cheating!" Yet, even then, his eyes went out the open door to-

The teen pursed his lips.

Great. Just great.

Ian would be _thrilled_.

Alex sighed, leaving the room to the-

He swallowed.

He wasn't _allowed_ to go in there.

Ian would be _very_ angry when he found out that his nephew had gone into his office for a game of hide-and-seek.

And, Alex grimaced, surveying the damaged, he had picked the lock.

He grit his teeth. What _idiot_ thought that giving lockpicks to a _seven-year-old_, was a good idea?!

He didn't realize how many of his own babysitters had thought the exact same thing.

The teen knocked softly on the door, painfully aware that Wolf and Eagle had gotten bored while waiting for them and were coming up the stairs. Snake had sulked out of the guestroom, unwilling to miss all the 'excitement.'

Alex frowned- no answer.

That was a bad sign.

Hesitantly, he grasped the doorknob, turning it gently, and-

The door swung open effortlessly.

"Stay here," Alex murmured to the others, quietly shutting the door behind him.

Eyes swept over the room- a wooden desk, wooden floor, a few bookshelves, and-

Nothing.

No where to hide.

And no one hiding.

Then... had he been wrong?

But- his eyes narrowed at the open window. No, he hadn't been wrong.

O-o-O-o-O

Ben Daniels smirked, the branches of the tree gently bobbing/swaying under the small weight.

He _always_ won hide-and-seek- especially against babysitters.

Fox frowned. Unless Snake had snitched- but, his expression smoothed over, Snake wouldn't do that- he had promised- pinky-swear and everything!

And, technically, he wasn't even doing anything _wrong_.

He was hiding in a _tree_, not any of the restricted spots that Alex had so willingly (and temptingly, he added) listed off. The office had been merely a-a _passageway._ Yeah. Nothing wrong at all.

Plus, it would take _forever_ for Alex to find him.

Babysitters never even _guessed_ that he had a set of lockpicks, either. And it was _such_ a good advantage.

Ben knew that Alex would've heard him if he had tried going outside the 'regular' way, so, he had improvised! It was a genius idea, too, and-

It could be said that Fox was _very_ surprised when a certain teenager popped out of the window and joined him in the tree.

Ben gaped. "It's been, like, five minutes! There's no way you could've found me that fast!" he burst out.

Alex raised an eyebrow, unimpressed.. "I know what you mean," he said dryly. "Longest game of hide-and-seek I've had in a while."

Fox glared icily at him (and a bit suspiciously, too). "Did Snake snitch on me?"

"No, he didn't," the teen said smoothly. "And I should have known that you would try something like this." He gave a wry smile. "Who gave you the lockpicks?"

Ben told himself that he wouldn't been surprised- but he still was, anyway. "My mom."

Alex glanced warily back at the window- and the office, Fox guessed. "You're not allowed in there, either?:

The teenager winced. "No, and Ian _isn't_ going to be happy."

Well, _that_ was an understatement.

O-o-O-o-O

**Fact: The internet usage in the entire continent of Africa is equal to the amount of New York... city.**

**Question: I've been trying to improve my humor-writing (Life of a Spy was to improve my angst writing)- _please_, if there's anything you found funny in it, tell me- and I know it's definitely lacking. So, tell me what you think! PM, reviews, it doesn't matter.**

**Oh! Another thing- are there any games you want them to do? Or any ideas of X thing happening? **


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